“Khushi se phool gaye ho?”. Has someone asked you this question recently? 9 out of 10 times, people hear this question post their marriage. I gained 7 kgs in 10 months of my marriage and a friend of mine joked “At least it’s not 1 kg a month!” That made me think about the whole marriage – happiness – weight circle. Most of us have this thinking that weight gain is bound to happen post marriage. Well… let me tell you, it’s true! But, not because of the reasons we think.
Seesaw of Fitness
Over the last 15 years I have been on a seesaw when it comes to fitness. Most of us are! At some point in our life, each one of us realizes that it’s now time to start working out in some way or the other, or, control/watch what we eat before we turn into a potato. I realized it 15 years ago! We are super charged at the Eureka moment when we decide to become the “member” of a fitness center. Sooner rather than later, it becomes fun when we start getting in the shape as well (at least mentally).
But as it usually happens while playing on a seesaw, as soon as the kid applies more weight he goes down while the kid on the other side goes up. In our mind as well, being fit is like a seesaw with only one exception. As soon as we get complacent in the process of losing weight, in the fitness seesaw, we go down and the tendency to gain weight goes up. I have been on both sides of the it multiple times (4 to be precise). Leaving a few percentage of extremely committed (towards fitness) people aside, this is the story of most of us out there.
Like every other game, playing seesaw has its own art. You have to understand how and when the other player is applying pressure so that you can counter it. Similarly, if you have to come on top of the Fitness Seesaw, you have to first understand who is on the other side and how it is applying pressure to pull you down.
Offbeat Diet or Situation?
After constantly finding myself on the other side of fitness, it made me think about the pattern. Even before I join a fitness center this time, I wanted to understand the real reason I find myself in this plight. Most of the trainers out there will blame your diet and say “You must not be eating right!”. Now, that’s definitely true to a certain extent but, what we don’t ponder much is the situation leading our diet to go offbeat. And no, I am not talking about any depression caused by breakup or unemployment.
As it turns out, our body gets into routine, healthy or unhealthy, depending upon our lifestyle. And, when there is a change in this set lifestyle we see a shift on the weighing scale as well. The 4 situations when my body’s routine changed gears and let the seesaw swing in opposite direction were:
- Starting my college
- Going to the US for higher studies
- Relocating back to India
- Post marriage
One thing was common in all of the above situations: My diet was not in my control. All those changes meant I had to wait for my mind to accept the eatery changes. But the good part, as with most of the sensible humans, is that I understood the need of the hour to workout and be fit again.
To counter the first change of shifting gears from home food to street/junk food with friends in college, I started gymming for the first time in my life while getting used to the then new lifestyle, and lost 10 kgs!
Then getting acquainted to American cuisine took a toll on my health and I gained almost 50 pounds. Yes, from 75-78 kgs I shot up to over 95 kgs after 1 year in the US. It’s good that I had lot of free time and a gym in my university where I was able to attain a decent workout routine and came back to my normal weight.
Then accepting roti/subzi after relocating to India was similar transition. What helped was the motivation to look good on my wedding.
Finally, dinner with my wife have always been a treat. It takes time to understand what you both like and what not. But, until you do, you eat. And, we ate!
Marriage is not the cause of your weight gain
9 out of 10 couples will gain weight after marriage, but the truth is if their life would have changed a similar way individually, they would have still put on a few pounds. Like it happened with me, there were 3 other situations in my life prior to my marriage which had an adverse effect on my weight. But, because they were not socially prevalent as marriage, they went unnoticed.
Marriage, on the other hand, is a grandeur event of one’s life which tend to have a lasting effect socially as well. And, thus comes people’s stigma that you will gain weight post marriage – “Khushi se phool gaya hoga!” Instead of tabooing marriage with weight gain, one must understand the real reason behind it and be prepared when the situation comes.
In my experience, and most of you out there would agree, the real cause of sudden increase in your inches is erratic eating habits which are the consequences of sudden changes in your lifestyle. Because of its impetuous nature, these lifestyle changes don’t allow our mind to control and settle in quickly. Thus, resulting us to be on the other side of the Fitness Seesaw!