Ladke Ka Mayka

It was when I was returning home after completing my first semester (of college), I understood the true meaning of “Mayka”!

While growing up I used to see my sister-in-law going to her hometown every summer while my brother used to stay back home with us and later, would go to pick her up. This is the common story of each and every household, at least in India. Because of the nature of Indian society where men lives with their parents while their spouses join them, no one ever talks about a man going to his mayka as he is already living in one.

Men in a Metro

We see so many people migrating out of their hometown for better future. Sometimes for studies, sometimes for expanding their business or sometimes, just for exploring what other cities have in store. Whatever be the reason they take the plunge to leave their parents and settle in an unknown city. And when they do, they get married eventually. Living happily ever after. (This is where Bollywood movies end).

Every now and then, they visit their hometown with their spouses. Have fun. Come back to their unknown city. Work. Vacation. Repeat.

While their spouses have the same mode on, they tend to instil one thought in men- “When do we get to go our Mayka?!”. Unlike old days, when only handful of couples used to live away from home to make their living, men don’t seem to get enough time with their parents post marriage now-a-days. The question is- When does a ladka go to his Mayka?

Old Days…

From centuries we have seen three trends:

  1. Girl gets married to a guy and they start living together with groom’s family.
  2. On occasions, men visit their in-laws
  3. Women tend to visit their parents at least once a year.

In a relationship, maintaining the balance between the two families is of utmost importance and the girl, who is supposedly leaving her family post marriage, is required to visit her parents once in a while. Nothing wrong there! After all, they did grew up in their home for 24 years (on an average). It would be harsh if anything less than a visit (once a year) is expected of them. The men, on the other hand, continue to live in the house they grew up and they get to spend the same old (pre marriage days) when their spouses are on the “nani ke ghar” leave.

Changing times…

Although, nothing is wrong in the way things have been from ages, but, times are changing in today’s day and age. From an early age, students tend to relocate to different cities for prospective career options. The number of couples living in a nuclear family has gone up drastically if we take the last decade. Even with these changing times we are still following the old days trend (with a small change)…

  1. Girl gets married to a guy, they start a nuclear family and visit the groom’s family together.
  2. On occasions, men visit their in-laws
  3. Women tend to visit their parents at least once a year.

The amount of time men spend with their parents has gone down in the recent past. It has nothing to do with women. No spouse in this world will ever want to drift their partners away!!!

Metro to Mayka

“Does it even make sense?”, one might argue… After all, where you want to spend your vacation/holidays is totally at your own discretion, but, situations are not always in your control! The more you try to control, the more it tends to get away from you. The emotions are still intact even with these changing times but you tend to take the high road when it comes to mending ways according to the current situations.

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